I'm Still Breathin'

Have you ever been driving around, looking for a particular car? Whether it was parked on the side of the road, or maybe, just maybe, the universe would put you two on the same street, and you’d pass each other? Whatever the case, I noticed something when experiencing this very situation; before long, all the headlights of all the cars begin to look like the exact one I longed to find. However, not once did the car in question cross my path. 

Obviously it wasn’t the car itself I needed to find. It never is. Cars are just a mode of transportation… something that aids us to live our lives, work our jobs, and chase our dreams. I just found it interesting that in a moment of longing and desperation, my mind started to see just what it wanted to—my mind comforted my heart by creating the scenario where there was hope. Crazy how the relationship between mind and body work, isn’t it?

My heart kept me out looking. My heart was giving me hope. My heart was what was giving me strength.... and in this moment all my mind wanted was to protect the innocence of that. My mind knew better. My mind knew I needed to go home, get in bed, and recover. But our bodies are a a complex thing, full of gears, all of which work hand in hand to keep us moving.

We do what we have to to stay alive. 

The biggest part of staying alive is that it is between me, my emotional heart, and my cautious mind. I, as well as all of you, have to trust that the rhythm between mind, body, and spirit are doing what they need to. We need to trust in ourselves, in our past, in how we were raised, and in faith. 

It's time to listen to those around us, those in our circle, and those we love... but to act upon your own knowledge and intuition.  I'm 20 years old... ALMOST 21. I'm not a kid anymore. I'm doing what I need to do to stay alive, and ultimately that is left up to me. 

Please know that I'm acting in harmony with my heart, mind, and my spirit. Please know that when life gets too hard to stand, that I fall directly to my knees. Please know that all of you that have touched my life in one way or another, have had a hand in helping me become the person i'm destined to be.... and please trust in how i've been molded. Trust in how i've been raised. Trust that i'm just a girl, with a lot of love to give. After all that I have... Why shouldn't I give back? Why shouldn't I stand strong and help hold someone else up for a change?

It's not an impossible task. It's hard. It's tiring. It's emotionally draining. But I am growing! I am strengthening my spiritual core! And I am learning! 

That's all we can ask in this life. Sometimes it takes reminding someone else to breathe, to realize how alive we've been all along. There is no such thing as having too many people love you, and there is no such thing as loving too much, too deeply, or too sincerely. We need to give breath to those in need whenever we can, until they are strong enough to stand on their own... only then will we get the air WE need to not only live, but to thrive. 

I am here. I am here because I have breath to give. The scariest part of this all is that the one person I want most to hold me up right now... is the one person making it impossible to stand. I don't know what the future holds. But I as a fellow, breathing, living human... I know i'm here. Please, know I'm here. 

We can do this.